Saturday, April 14, 2007
The elephant in the room
Jacob's been going through a major depression ever since the evil steroid days last fall.
While it hasn't been exactly a secret, it didn't seem fair to reveal it in such a public forum as a blog. Last week, though, he chose to tell his class, so it seems okay to talk about it. Not mentioning it here has been like not mentioning an elephant in the living room.
Depression is a hellish thing. I don't know if I could say it's as bad as cancer, or not - but the pain is just as real and, at times, terrible. It's not that the good, even wonderful, things haven't been real, but they have been hard-won, and all the more precious because of that.
Like the support we've gotten throughout this time. The big kids have been with us, always. Actually Jacob's been at Ellie's in Philadelphia all week. Not only is Ellie there for Jacob, but her boyfriend, Jacob Fenton, and her friends and house-mates are there for her.
Our friends have been incredible: generous, loving. I started to give examples but there's too much for one post.
Nueva, Jacob's school, has been a haven for me as well as Jacob. On one of the harder days I stopped by the school library for a cup of coffee, and just a few minutes with the people there eased my heart. Jacob's teachers, and Diane, the school head have been unbelievably wonderful.
Now I'm getting all verklempt.
I just wish Jacob could see how amazing he is. We are so proud of him, the way he's handled everything. He's so...so competent. So good at figuring out situations. So empathic, and aware.
Here's he is going through security on his way to Philly - blurry because I was far back behind the ropes. He's coming back tomorrow evening.
I thought it was really funny that there is a Wikipedia entry on the elephant in the room.
While it hasn't been exactly a secret, it didn't seem fair to reveal it in such a public forum as a blog. Last week, though, he chose to tell his class, so it seems okay to talk about it. Not mentioning it here has been like not mentioning an elephant in the living room.
Depression is a hellish thing. I don't know if I could say it's as bad as cancer, or not - but the pain is just as real and, at times, terrible. It's not that the good, even wonderful, things haven't been real, but they have been hard-won, and all the more precious because of that.
Like the support we've gotten throughout this time. The big kids have been with us, always. Actually Jacob's been at Ellie's in Philadelphia all week. Not only is Ellie there for Jacob, but her boyfriend, Jacob Fenton, and her friends and house-mates are there for her.
Our friends have been incredible: generous, loving. I started to give examples but there's too much for one post.
Nueva, Jacob's school, has been a haven for me as well as Jacob. On one of the harder days I stopped by the school library for a cup of coffee, and just a few minutes with the people there eased my heart. Jacob's teachers, and Diane, the school head have been unbelievably wonderful.
Now I'm getting all verklempt.
I just wish Jacob could see how amazing he is. We are so proud of him, the way he's handled everything. He's so...so competent. So good at figuring out situations. So empathic, and aware.
Here's he is going through security on his way to Philly - blurry because I was far back behind the ropes. He's coming back tomorrow evening.
I thought it was really funny that there is a Wikipedia entry on the elephant in the room.
# posted by Ann @ 10:41 PM 
